All people around the world are subjected to criticism on their appearance (body wise, to be specific) and if you see on social media there’s a term going around which is “body shaming”, even though this term usually targets bodies of high profile folks like celebs add models but we common people are nonetheless targeted too. In the Pakistani society, our bodies are continuously ridiculed and criticized by aunties and peers all around, in several crappy ways, just because a brown woman’s body is expected to look like a Victoria Secret Angel’s size zero throughout her life.
If you fail to come up to those expectations you aren’t just hurt, these remarks are the major reason why most individuals are least motivated to even workout for an improved body and a healthy one too.
A huge problem that we brown people face is that we mercilessly criticize others on everything and when it’s about weight than you might as well kiss your dignity goodbye. Titles like single pasli and moti bhains seem to be very subtle remarks but for the one on the receiving end of them might not have the same sense of humor as you do. These remarks make us think badly about their appearance if we aren’t already concerned about it.
The Shaadi Ki Fikar
One reason that much of our Pakistani awaam loses weight is to look good obviously and many take on the weight loss challenge because of the pressure to look attractive for the sake of marriage. The constant “Beta, moti ho, shadi kaise hogi tumhari?” question made by our wise elders serves as a reason to feel some shame and cut down because apparently, we aren’t good enough as we are. We change our bodies because and for other people and that damages us in the long run because appearance change should be for our self, not others. It should be for a healthy body.
All overweight brown folks have at least once in their lifetime fallen prey to the ridiculous family taunts or practical jokes about their physique. What ‘they’ don’t get is that we are aware of our flabby arms and legs but we don’t need the haathi aur gaye bhains jokes to make us feel worse and give up on even trying losing some weight. The family needs to be working as a support system if someone is looking forward to curing their obesity, which is further discussed in the last part of this piece.
The Clothing Comments
The “size dekhein aur fashion dekhein” comments are like shards tearing through the soul. People don’t necessarily say it to our face but we happen to hear all that judgmental talk about our weight and our choice of clothing. Just because we do not reach up to your standards of health doesn’t mean that we don’t know how we look and maybe we are already fighting the battle with weight and are making progress but your stupid comments can turn out to be mentally disturbing and can be discouraging if you are looking forward to a new diet program.
Lack Of Support For A New Start
In brown families, it is so hard to get everyone to stop telling you what to do and what not to do. All overweight peeps who wake up one day to realize that they need to change their habits and bring a change in themselves genuinely try to do so, but Aha! That is where the family comes in “Bhai is excersie ka koi faida nai hai” and then when you give in to binging stuff you hear them saying “Beta, kitna khaaoge?”